The "adventure" into a new territory of employing someone to work within our household began for me about a month ago and finalized this week. I started by praying about it, choosing an agency, doing lots of paperwork and tests, then interviewing potential employees.
This week we welcomed a new addition to our household who is now like part of the family. We hired a live-in "Domestic Helper" and she has been wonderful. Having a "Helper"- not my words, theirs - is very normal in Singapore. The majority of people here employ one to help cook, clean, assist with household management and help watch the children. It took me a while to warm up to the idea, due to the "live-in" part of the deal. After talking to many people who employ helpers, realizing how often Mark was going to travel and that I'd manage the house and children alone, I accepted the deal.
Having a helper is so common here that every single apartment and house is built with an extra room for a maid. Guess what? After 9/11, every apartment and house was built with a bomb shelter, too. In some homes, this also serves as the maid's room. So, yes, we have a bomb shelter in our condo, in case of an emergency. Scary, right?
Our helper's name is Yani and she is already like part of the family (this is written a month later). She helps me so much, especially when Mark is out of town. The first two weeks were a little awkward because I felt like I needed to entertain her all the time. But after two weeks, I got used to it. She eats with our family and watches TV with us, etc - because we welcome her to - but she also likes her privacy and lets us have ours, too. She is great with our kids and they really like her in return. Most outstanding is that she is an extraordinary cook. She makes me look like I can hardly boil water. Mark is in heaven.
Unfortunately in Singapore, many domestic are mistreated and disrespected. They are not thought of as "equal" to their employers. However, it is very important to me/us that while employing Yani, we set the right example to our children. Yani is no better or worse than us. We treat her with respect. Her job just happens to be helping us with our house and kids. We ask her to eat with us. We share our food with her. We make her room as comfortable as we can. We care about her.
Because of her, I can play with and pay attention to my kids more often, I can volunteer more often, and I can have more time to myself or more time to manage our household. I am more patient with my kids. I'm in a better mood when my husband comes home from work. I prayed for a month before Yani came into our lives that we would meet and interview the right person to come live with us. That "it would work the first try". So far, so good!
